Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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