Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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