So drunk its hurt
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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