Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize