I must be too annoying 4 u.
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
