Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
