where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
