she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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