the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Shame is for Republicans.
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