what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
sarcasm needs its own font
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
