Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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