I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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