My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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