Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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