We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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