I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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