hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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