He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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