I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
