You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
