And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
