Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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