I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
