if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
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