I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
