Don't you send me to vm
How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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