do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
sex in a hospital.. check
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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