My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
