i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
