Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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