Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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