we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
