if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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