Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
