ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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