he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
