Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Randomize
