I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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