just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
