low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
