....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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