You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
