i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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