My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Never let your siblings swipe right.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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