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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Who won?

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  All of them.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!

  (805): View more from California

  God Bless America!

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin

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• (+79): View more from

  Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks

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• (619): View more from California

  I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.

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• (510): View more from California

  Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.

  (650): View more from California

  Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.

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• (209): View more from California

  dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"

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