i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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