You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
