He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
