Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
