hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize