garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Randomize
